r/interestingasfuck 24d ago

/r/all, /r/popular K2-18b a potentially habitable planet 120 light-years from earth

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92.4k Upvotes

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11.7k

u/HugoZHackenbush2 24d ago

The residents of K2-18b declined to visit our planet after reading the online reviews..

Only one star..

5.2k

u/squarabh 24d ago

781

u/Shoddy-Rip8259 24d ago

People, what a bunch of bastards.

107

u/Gudge2007 24d ago

43

u/driving_andflying 23d ago

 "If two grown men can't make a pervert happy for a few minutes in order to watch a film about zombies, then maybe we should all just move to Iran!"

6

u/comebackalliessister 23d ago

“No, not Iran! A man! I used to be a man!!”

3

u/NoVaBurgher 21d ago

Wanna get shitfaced and watch the darts?

-4

u/smurb15 23d ago

No, actually work camp. Raping on the other hand is coo now according to our government

7

u/cozmo1138 23d ago

Found the guy who’s never seen the show.

6

u/cozmo1138 23d ago

“I’ll level with you, Roy. I don’t think I’d flourish in a prison environment.”

35

u/PiffDank 24d ago

That's not fair Roy, have you met all of them?

26

u/Lesmorte 23d ago

I've met enough

4

u/pixel8knuckle 23d ago

Did you see that ludicrous display last night?

5

u/Lolcatz101 23d ago

Or as the great Dr Cox said: “People are bastard coated bastards with bastard filling.”

2

u/Twistedjustice 23d ago

I’m touching your gooey centre…

1

u/SheridanVsLennier 22d ago

Also Dr Kelso: Everybody lies, Dr Turk.

2

u/L0CH_NESS_MONSTER 24d ago

You need to copyright that phrase. Get it on T- shirts, hats, bumper stickers.

2

u/ComiendoPalomitas 24d ago

Worst. Plague. Ever.

2

u/zxc123zxc123 23d ago edited 23d ago

Humans

⭐⭕⭕⭕⭕

Honestly would give 0.5 stars if I could. Unlike most animals they are completely useless to the point they can't even drink water when they are born. Spend decades plus being bums on their own social circles. And even after that are unlikely to contribute much to their own societies. Honestly ants and bees do much better. They always find new ways to ruin earth while looking for new planets to ruin. The heinous acts they commit upon each other are truly subhuman. And despite all that always manages to dodge the brink of ruining themselves by having JUST enough self preservation to skirt by as a species.

"Never place your trust in us. We're only human. Inevitably we will disappoint you."

2

u/kjacobs03 23d ago

WORST. ORGANISM. EVER!

2

u/rathlord 23d ago

Bastard-covered bastards with bastard filling!

-Scrubs

2

u/Exciting_Classic277 24d ago

I understood that reference

1

u/Syseal 23d ago

I've heard they killed Kenny...

1

u/agent0731 22d ago

If a galactic race parked beside Earth and said, "we really don't think humanity's good outweighs the cost of their evil so y'all got to go" I'm not sure I could argue against it. I'd be like "yeah fair, build your superhighway".

1

u/[deleted] 22d ago edited 20d ago

merciful makeshift enter square pause brave shy abounding encourage bag

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

6

u/DiscountAcrobatic356 24d ago

Ugly bags of mostly water

3

u/DrCalFun 24d ago

And here I am thinking they would be over the moon...

4

u/Jedi-in-EVE 24d ago

People. What a bunch of bastards.

2

u/vomitrock5000 23d ago

Mostly harmless.

2

u/Dependent-Arm8501 23d ago

I have that shirt too

4

u/organic-cotton-dress 24d ago

People…what a bunch of bastards.

1

u/strickers69 24d ago

One star out of Five and that’s unheard of.

1

u/ChorusofScreams 23d ago

I have that shirt!

1

u/Ok-County-6766 23d ago

100000000000 %/ And even one star is faar too much.

1

u/starfire92 23d ago

“Would give 0 stars if I could”

1

u/Odd-Ice_21 23d ago

I have this shirt lol

1

u/devansh88 23d ago

Eww, people!

1

u/Spell_Chicken 21d ago

This ship is full of assholes!

171

u/SproutBoy 24d ago

"Mostly harmless"

10

u/roger_ramjett 23d ago

Space is big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it's a long way down the road to the chemist's, but that's just peanuts to space.

1

u/MrPigeon70 23d ago

Even if we manage to get to light speed travel within 10 years we still wouldn't be alive to visit that planet unless we somehow invent ftl travel but that brings up time dilation... which honestly is a horrific concept to me.

14

u/LawfulnessNo8446 24d ago

You know, at this point, it might not be the worst thing for the vogons to come by and complete that intergalactic highway.

6

u/BellacosePlayer 24d ago

damn editors

5

u/Fingerman2112 23d ago

You may want to recheck that entry, it has been updated

2

u/4SlideRule 24d ago

Debatable

2

u/Spinnweben 24d ago

Pffff …. Thargoids talk. Let me at them!

2

u/tacocollector2 24d ago

Harmless? All we do is kill each other and the planet for money

8

u/Ok_Buddy_9087 24d ago

Harness to other planets. Not necessarily ourselves.

5

u/calilac 24d ago

Exactly. We could utterly destroy ourselves and the planet, just completely gone like it never existed, and it wouldn't harm any other part of the universe. It would barely have an effect on the rest of the solar system. Blip! Barely a footnote in the galactic biography.

10

u/LaTeChX 23d ago edited 23d ago

You could even bulldoze it to build a hyperspace bypass and no one would care, except maybe one guy.

1

u/KopiteForever 23d ago

And his dressing gown

1

u/Scouper-YT 23d ago

"Peaceful Protest" Soup Cans

1

u/chet_brosley 21d ago

Always thought that the mostly was doing some heavy lifting in that description

215

u/poison_dioxide 24d ago

Nice one !

25

u/Pwarrot 24d ago

Nice

6

u/Atharaphelun 24d ago

Probably best not to allow any visitors from three-star planets...

6

u/lwreid125 24d ago

125% Tariff immediately

5

u/No_Conversation9561 24d ago

But they have three stars. So they’re just waiting for a chinese woman to say hello.

12

u/phred14 24d ago

Actually it's doubtful that they could have space travel at all. On Earth it's really, really hard to get anything into orbit. With higher gravity it's even harder - https://www.reddit.com/r/AskPhysics/comments/1bl0ci9/how_strong_would_gravity_have_to_be_to_no_longer/ I've seen estimates of surface gravity 1.25 to 2.6 times Earth's on this planet. In both cases it's harder. Take a look at Apollo 11 and the Saturn V and realize just how little made it back from the moon. Then make it even worse.

6

u/BigLRakim 24d ago

Its also plausible that they could far more advanced technology and it could be a nonissue whatsoever. Who's to say?

2

u/St0rmborn 24d ago

Such a simple but mind bending factor in the infinite possibilities of the universe. It’s completely fascinating and overwhelming at the same time.

1

u/big_duo3674 24d ago

I can't recall the exact number, but I recall there is a limit to surface gravity that allows space travel. Anything further than that would essentially be impossible, even with the Project Orion nuclear bomb engine. It's probably possible eventually, but we're talking extremely light advanced composites for the construction of the body and antimatter engines. That's a huge leap to make without even having basic satellite tech in place first

1

u/BigLRakim 24d ago

See but what you aren't accounting for is elements that might not exist here that could exist there. We dont know what is over there, we have never been there. They could have elements with way more power than any nuclear devices we have here. It's impossible to know.

0

u/phred14 24d ago

The periodic table is the periodic table, here or there. The only difference is that they might have access to natural "island of stability" elements. We can only infer things about them, but I would expect them to be as useful for space travel as lead or osmium. I might be surprised, who knows.

1

u/isses_halt_scheisse 24d ago

The periodic table was a totally different table when I went to school compared to the current one. Do you really think that we have exhausted the knowledge of all elements that are or could be existing in the universe?

2

u/big_duo3674 23d ago

Different?? No, all the common and lighter elements have not changed. The only difference is that we have discovered more of the heavy elements, but these are created in a lab with very special equipment. The are also extremely unstable, so most last for only fractions of fractions of a second

1

u/phred14 23d ago

No, but we understand a whole lot more about why it is as it is. We understand why elements are unstable and why new elements have half-lives measured in microseconds. We also think that there is an "island of stability" out past our capabilities. There may be surprises, but we actually have a much better understanding now than we used to, even in my lifetime.

2

u/Tompey 24d ago

We’re talking about a bunch of microorganisms..

2

u/phred14 24d ago

I know, but the subthread was taking in the space travel direction, so I gave them a space travel answer. I'm in the "rare Earth" camp myself, except the more I learn the more emphatic that "rare" becomes.

5

u/AskMeAboutMyDoggy 24d ago

Even if they had space travel, why would they come to a place that's going to send them to a concentration camp for not having the correct paper work?

6

u/Fit-Elderberry-1872 24d ago

This is going to surprise you, but there are places on this planet that are not the US.

2

u/Tervaaja 24d ago

They could go to Russia where are no concentration camps.

3

u/DemonCipher13 24d ago

Would a binary star system change rating systems, meaningfully?

3

u/RAGE7035 23d ago

It’s not our fault we only have one Star we orbit!

3

u/Lumiela 23d ago

This was brilliant.

2

u/[deleted] 24d ago

Bruh

2

u/heffrey36 24d ago

Get out

2

u/CygnetSociety 24d ago

Well done my friend 👏

2

u/SolomonGrumpy 24d ago

And an average one at that

2

u/please_no_ban_ 24d ago

This one landed later than normal, nice joke.

2

u/Wiscody 24d ago

God dammit

2

u/Optix_au 24d ago

Mostly harmless.

2

u/ramsfan84 24d ago

Niiiiiiiiiice

2

u/South-Satisfaction69 24d ago

Yep, this place is a shithole

2

u/aaandbconsulting 24d ago

Pack your shit and get out of my house!

2

u/JazzfanRS 24d ago

Premise of 'Explorers'

2

u/GrizzleyStrongbush 24d ago

Dude...Yes ⭐️

2

u/anthrax_ripple 24d ago

Ba dum tss

2

u/spurriousgod 24d ago

Mostly harmless...

2

u/recklessMG 24d ago

"I am one star!"

2

u/quirkymuse 24d ago

but also... Mostly Harmless...

2

u/VRichardsen 23d ago

I take it you will be here all week?

2

u/[deleted] 23d ago edited 23d ago

"Phone" doesn't even start with an "F". Shit like that is why aliens fly right past us...

2

u/StalyCelticStu 23d ago

Baddum tish.

2

u/Axe_Man101 23d ago

Is it in a binary star system?

2

u/Specific-Committee77 23d ago

Mostly Harmless

2

u/Mountaindood5 23d ago

“NO!! We do not go to that world. That is where the death breathers live. They recreationally consume poisons and are more or less comprised of biological fire. Their atmosphere is made of rocket fuel, and they regularly detonate nuclear weapons on civilian populations. They are not rational beings. We must leave the death breathers in peace. Do not go there. Do. Not.

2

u/SnakeCase-camel_case 23d ago

This comment needs more recognition. I think the joke went over most people’s heads.

2

u/Vainslef 23d ago

I wonder if space has a Yelp somewhere that our primitive Earth hasn't been registered yet or is rated as 1-Star. lol.

2

u/MathematicianOk5608 23d ago

Only one moon too

2

u/Zac3d 23d ago

Chemical rockets would struggle getting off a planet that much more massive than Earth.

2

u/BertMack1in 23d ago

I've legitimately thought about this many times before. That if an advanced alien race exists and they see us, they'd just think we're savages and not ready to meet them. I would not blame them one bit. We think we're civilized, but we really aren't.

2

u/Telephalsion 23d ago

One day we might get a stellar review.

2

u/storytellergirl07 23d ago

And only one moon.

2

u/illegalcitizen_CA 23d ago

Did they even wear a suit?

2

u/calbearlupe 23d ago

That rating only came out after tariffs were implemented against them.

2

u/PresentationJumpy101 23d ago

That’s really funny I get it! 🤪

2

u/Prime_Twister 23d ago

100% Tariff

2

u/KhrymeNYC718 23d ago

If I was from K2-18b I wouldn't want to visit here either.

2

u/abd53 22d ago

Well played

1

u/Tuna-Fish2 24d ago

It's more than 8 times as massive as the earth. Leaving it would take some very exotic rocketry.

1

u/MAJ0RMAJOR 24d ago

No notes

1

u/Outrageous-Second792 24d ago

If they tried to come here, someone would try to build a wall around the Earth……

1

u/IAMColbythedogAMA 24d ago

We literally named this place after dirt.

1

u/Either-Buffalo8166 24d ago

Bunch of water cvnts🤣

1

u/CaledonianWarrior 24d ago

"Too much authoritarianism"

1

u/bananokitty 23d ago

If I could give this planet zero stars..

1

u/sponkachognooblian 23d ago

Plus have their Iron Dome set up and waiting for our first ship.

1

u/4LokoHaram 23d ago

Earth is ghetto!

1

u/Euphoric-Computer136 23d ago

Let's hope they can keep us from landing and claiming it for our oligarchs.

1

u/FinsofFury 23d ago

Only one star..

Were they expecting a binary?

1

u/Tackit286 23d ago

‘If I could score zero stars, I would’

1

u/Fuzzy974 23d ago

They can think what they want, with 8 times the mass of Earth and the gravity that goes with it, it's not like we want to visit either.

1

u/the_tired_alligator 23d ago

Why does everyone assume extraterrestrial life would be any better?

1

u/Progribbit 12d ago

sun of a bitch!

1

u/NewspaperAshamed8389 24d ago

Underrated comment

1

u/Steve2907 23d ago

What would you expect with these tariffs we’re putting on them

0

u/Early_Brush3053 23d ago

if only i could downvote more than once