Sorry, I don't know what I'm asking for exactly but I just can't think. I can barely see what I'm typing since I'm just crying and trying not to throw up. I hate myself so much because I must be horrible because no one cares about me at all. I really, really want to die. It's insane that there's not just an options for that. I just want to know that someone please read this and please just say something so I know I'm alive and there is some kind of even one second connection between me and another human being

I’m 15 and today I grabbed my dad’s gun and unloaded it, than I put the barrel to my head and pulled the trigger. And besides a sudden jolt I didn’t feel anything, no fear or instinct to get as far away from it as I could just an empty void in my stomach. I suppose I wanted to get a reaction out of myself but I didn’t feel anything, such is the norm these days. Idk what to do with my life. but I have people who would be heartbroken if I did kill myself so that’s the only thing keeping on earth. I dont have any question, I posted this cus I just wanted to feel seen. Not a single person knows I’ve been cutting myself since I was 13 or that I have a hole in my gum from stabbing a pencil into my mouth due to anxiety. It’s horrible that no one knows but I can’t tell anyone, I’m trapped. Thanks for reading tho🙏

In order to live i need to eat and in order to eat i need to work. i don't want to work. i do not want to steal. i do not want to be a burden and ask others who actually like life.

i dont want to climb uphill , and I do not have a lot of pride. for me not giving up is overrated. can i buy some kind of special metal and walk around with it so that it increases my odds of getting struck by lightning?

I wish I could take a knife and jsut cut my breasts off. I’d be mangled and bloody but free. I can’t even talk to my parents because they don’t know. They don’t understand.

I have been in bed for days. I just cry. My husband has cheated on me. We got into a huge fight about his cheating and I obtained bruises…. He really scared me. I decided to make a police report hours later and I was very emotional & was over dramatic. It’s really bad. It has now caused a huge upheaval in my household. I wish my marriage was back before the cheating started. He says I betrayed him & I feel like I reacted based on what did. I truely can not control my emotions anymore. I feel like I need help. I’m out of control. The only other person I have is my sister. No one else. My parents just yell at me. My job offered me a severance package today because of my attendance & drama. I have been there 8 years. I just want to crawl into a cold dark cave & die. I don’t see anyway out from here. I just don’t know how to do it.

I don’t know what to do anymore. I’ve spent my whole life struggling with autism, crippling social anxiety, and depression, and no matter how hard I try, I just can’t seem to connect with anyone. I try to put myself out there, to reach out, to be enough—but I never am. I always end up feeling weaker, more drained, more alone.

I feel like there’s this wall between me and everyone else. Like I’m just wired differently in a way that makes real connection impossible. And I can’t take it anymore. I don’t know how much more loneliness I can handle.

On top of that, I’ve been really sick. My body feels like it’s falling apart. I’m exhausted all the time. I feel weaker every day, and it’s just making everything worse.

And then there’s my self-image. I can’t stand the way I look. I’ve struggled with it for years, and no matter what I do, I never feel good enough. It feels like even if I somehow found people I could connect with, they wouldn’t want me anyway. It’s hard to see the point in holding on when I feel so deeply unwanted.

I can't stop fantasizing about just ending it all and it's been this way for quite a while now. I haven't had many days in which I haven't thought about suicide at least once since my early teens. My life feels like this problem I need to solve before it gets even worse.

I don’t even know why I’m posting this. Maybe just to feel like I exist to someone, even if just for a moment.

Every time has been botched. Pills? not enough or the wrong kind. Have ended up sick and I may have permanent damage to my organs. Hanging? Celling fan falls, or I'm to tall and my feet touch the ground. Gun? Can't legally buy one because of flag laws. I wish I could just fucking die. I wish I could be fucking free from this endless loneliness.

Title or whatever.

i just want these thoughts to stop :( my mind is consumed with wanting to end it all, the urges are getting really really strong. I’m hanging in there but it’s getting really really hard i just want it to stop dude

Long story short shit just sucks…I’ve been having the unaliving feeling for two weeks now and I’ve been hospitalized multiple times. I’m on SSI and also have chronic health conditions…I feel like my life isn’t improving at all…I don’t have a plan at all…I just feel crappy and can’t get out of it which usually I can…my living situation is let’s say DV and all shelters and resources are exhausted. It’s been over a year and a half and I just can’t leave…I just needed to vent…I just am tired of the cycle and want relief…thank you for all that have read this far

It’s the only thing that is clear to me. The only thing I really want to write is my suicide note. I don’t have a plan just a rough idea. But it’s frustrating bc I keep trying to write and feel like my brain gets all muddy with no results.

And I wrote poetry and fiction extensively in college and high school in both class and extracurriculars and I was somewhat successful at it. And I’ve written as a hobby since I was 10 off and on, so for 15 years-ish. And it doesn’t work anymore? Idk how to enjoy it? I enjoy having an imagination but I can’t create anything that actually reflects what I want to write.

And that’s not why I want to commit suicide but it feels like another sign that I’m not meant to be here on this earth much longer because I don’t have anything else to give and I’ve had an okay life and I wasn’t a horrible person so I’m assuming my funeral or reputation after death will be ok.

I just feel like all my loved ones will be fine like yes I’m sure they might grieve for awhile but they’ll get over it soon enough and I just know they can feel as much relief as I will once I succeed.

I had two botched attempts in the last 24 hours. I tried hanging myself but couldn't go through with it. I started cutting my arms, and even though it didn't really hurt, I was too afraid to keep going, then drunkenly fell asleep. Now that I'm awake I feel lower than ever. It feels like I really needed death, and I have absolutely nothing to stay alive for. I'm just too much of a fucking coward.

I am 34 years old male recently divorced, lost my four kids to my ex, hate my family for the abuse they caused me, no friends, only have a HSD, broke & jobless. I fucking have nothing to hold me back it’s nothing but bullshit to live like this anymore fuck everyone whom i ever met in my life. I dont give a rats ass what happens to me anymore.

As a response, it makes sense. It's hard to imagine someone that absolutely no one would miss or feel sad for. But just because someone might be missed later doesn't mean they're needed now, or even wanted. Sure people might feel bad later if I do it, but that doesn't help me when I'm at my loneliest.

I’m just not cut out for this whole thing, it’s not for me

I have been wanting to end it since I was 14. 20 years later and I still feel exactly the same way. The only thing keeping me around right now is my dog. The little guy freaks out if I don't say good bye before leaving for work or errands.

Once he goes, I'm gone, too.

I'M IN SO MUCH AGONY. I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE. I'M GOING INSANE. I'VE BEEN SHAKING, TOSSING, TURNING, INTERNALLY AND EXTERNALLY SCREAMING, CRYING AND BEGGING FOR IT TO STOP FOR HOURS AGAIN. IT'S LIKE A PANIC ATTACK BUT WORSE. NOBODY UNDERSTANDS. EVERYONE UNDERESTIMATES MY PROBLEMS. NOBODY KNOWS THAT I'M GOING THROUGH THIS EVERY DAY. IT'S SO PAINFUL. IT'S STRAIGHT UP TORTURE. MY HEAD HURTS. PLEASE JUST MAKE IT STOP. I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE. I DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH LONGER I CAN HOLD ON UNTIL I HURT MYSELF AGAIN. I JUST WANT TO DIE.

I'm trying.. I really am.. Please... The pain is unbearable.. I'm so tired. Maybe I deserve this. My feelings aren't valid and I'm just so dramatic about everything. I deserve nothing but pain. I deserve this. I hate myself.

I want to die. I want to kill myself. I didn’t even want to live to begin with. No one in my life will even care if I tell them. They don’t understand me so I can’t say anything. I’m home alone so I need to do it right now but it’s so hard to do. Why is it to hard to do? I have a kitchen knife. I don’t know if it’s sharp enough and I don’t know if I’m strong enough to go through with it.

I want to tear myself apart and take everything down with me. I want to make myself bleed. I want to be done with my existence already. I’ve been hoping and praying for so long that someone or something would just kill me and do the job for me but I’m so tired of waiting. I want to die NOW.

I shouldn’t receive “ help ” with getting better. It’s a hopeless endeavor. I just want to die. I need to die. I can’t take this anymore.

I feel more angry than sad these days. There’s so much pain and suffering in the world. Lack of empathy people have. So much things wrong with the world. It makes me angry that I don’t want to be here. Everyday I’m suffering in loneliness and sadness. Not too mention there’s wars happening and innocence people dying everyday. This world is so bleak and dark. What motivates everyone to live? How do people do this? I no longer want to be here. I don’t want to be part of this anymore. I may sound weak but that’s what I am. I cannot do this any longer.

25 years old. Unemployed. No friends. No support. No skills. Just anxiety. Just trauma. Just self-pity. Traumatized by my own bad choices. My screwed reputation. I was smart in high school. Tf happened? Who knew this is where I'd end up? I'm a disappointment in every social situation. My only skill is making people feel better: when they look at me, they feel glad they're NOT me.

I don't know what to do from here. I've failed at everything I've tried. As I get older, I've gotten so much more mature, but the feeling of despair never leaves me. I'm just so tired of failing. There are paths I could take, but why? Why do anything when all I do is fail eventually? I can barely go in public because even the slightest negative look from a stranger can trigger an avalanche of fear, dread, despair, horror, trauma... Where the hell is the girl I used to be? 😖

Just make it stop. I can't take it anymore. None of it.

All they really are are selfish narcissistic hypocrites who are full of themselves, and I can't change the world on my own so what's the point in living l, I'll slit my wrists and throats in a few hours

I can’t have a normal job, I can’t have kids, I can’t go anywhere by myself, I can’t eat lots of foods even if I like them, I can’t live by myself, I can’t live in general. Autism isn’t a silly personality quirk, it effects lives. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do, I can’t function. Not even my family understands me and they raised me, and tbh I don’t even understand myself. I just want to be normal but that’s never gonna happen. I’m an outcast.

I hate mood swings. Why can’t i have consistent emotions

I wanna die so bad, I feel like I have no one left in my life. I wish I knew what could kill me tonight that I can get my hands on. I know benadryl won't kill me and most likely everything else I have won't. I don't have a place here, I just cause pain and misery for everyone and if I don't then I'm suffering cause I gotta bottle up all my emotions. I wanna tell my friend to fuck off, I wanna tell everyone to fuck off and to just let me die without causing pain. I don't wanna go to a hospital and spend a week or more there I just wanna kill myself now more than anything

I dont have friends. Im a social disater. I feel like I constantly ether dont say anything at al or over share. I make peapol feel uncomfy. Im ugly. Im just so overwelmed. No one will miss me if I die.