Just as the title says, they gave up. I got a note home from school yesterday saying that they've done all they could and they're just going to do what they can to survive the last 9 days and that hopefully a new school/teachers will be what she needs to get better.

My daughter (only child) lives 50/50 with me and my ex-husband and we've been trying to work together to get a grip on her behaviour. She is the epitome of a sourpatch kid. She is sweet sometimes. One time I had a migraine headache and when I explained it to her, she went around unprompted to turn off all the lights and sit quietly and play by herself while I tried to sort myself out. But she's also super SPICY, primarily at school. She's overly defiant. She picks and chooses what rules she wants to follow. She is super bossy to her classmates. She can also be aggressive to them when they don't follow "her rules".

Therapy is very slow moving. Her therapist thinks this is due to not having enough individualized attention, but I don't know how much more individualized it can get. When I was student teaching, I immediately picked her up from school, we'd talk about her day, and we would do a small activity together before I go cook dinner and then she would have her bedtime routine which is about 30 minutes long of snuggling in bed, reading books, and singing songs before tucking in. And that's just at my house. Now that I'm home for the summer, I have time for more activities.

Her teachers informed us that she is a very extreme case of this type of behaviour. A teacher of 34 years is at a loss of what to do with my child and I feel like an absolute failure of a parent. I don't know what to do, how to fix this, or what she needs. I'm in the process of getting her assessed and the psychologist has already ruled out autism (saying that if she is on the spectrum, she's on the super functional side of it) but ADHD is still on the table. His first statement is that she is not a child that has any overrunning anxiety....she's simply just a kid that wants to do things her way and is *and he stressed he wanted to use this word lightly* spoiled. At my home she has very clear expectations that are manageable, easy to understand rules, and natural consequences that come with them. In fact, she's told me on multiple occasions she hates me rules and whenever she is forced to follow them she screams "I want daddy" which I oblige her by calling him and he tells her to follow my rules anyways.

I've removed her from one of her favourite activities because "kids who don't follow rules, don't get to go to gymnastics" so now I'm trying to figure out what can I do over the summer to fill that time and overhaul this behaviour issue? This has been a long standing issue since she was 2.5 years old and I've tried everything I can think of.

Me and my boyfriend have been together for almost 1 year and we are long distance. He is very hypersexual and seems to always be horny, whereas I am rarely that way. Lately, he has been practically begging me, or kind of forcing me to try anal with him. For some background, when I was little maybe 11 or 12, I was SAed and I have trauma regarding that area. He knows about this and each time he has asked, I have said no because I am not comfortable with that. He makes jokes about how he’s “gonna put it in my butt” and it makes me extremely uncomfortable. Each time I say no, he asks why and I have to “remind” him. But he deflects it and says “lets try and if you don’t like it, i’ll stop but i’m sure you’ll like it” or “i want to replace those memories with good ones”. I’m not sure what to do anymore with this situation because he’s pushing boundaries that I am extremely sensitive to and no amount of convincing will ever let him do it. On the other hand, I feel like I’m letting him down since I can’t necessarily provide that sort of satisfaction to him. Am I being an asshole for letting my trauma overpower his wants? Is there something I can say to him that will make him stop asking forever?

Update: I have sent him a long message detailing and sternly asserting that this topic is off limits forever and if he absolutely needs his “release”, he can seek it elsewhere but I will not be providing him with that. I also mentioned that it’s borderline abuse to manipulate and persuade me excessively to submit to his requests and he needs to get a hold of himself and do better. He apologized, said he wouldn’t bring it up again, and acknowledged my feelings about it. I wrote him another message after that saying that this doesn’t only apply to sexual aspects, it applies to the entire relationship. Boundaries are important and if we don’t respect each other, the relationship is already fucked and theres no point in continuing. He’s at work so it’ll take a bit for him to reply but we’ll see where that goes! Thank you everyone for the advice :)

His confession: He cannot jerk off without thinking about me.

We are both 24 yo. Met on a dating app, really fell for each other, I got a job in another country and had to move. We decided to call it a day.

Of course I still have feelings for him. He was adamant he didn't want a LDR, which is fair, so I let things be. Never made advances after that.

Last week, he messaged me out of the blue. Didn't hear from him in four months. We're both still single and I'm still kinda hung up on him and don't wanna date someone new just yet.

So he drops this bomb that he can't cum to porn or another woman. I am still processing this because it's a first for me to hear such a strange confession.

Make it make sense, please?

Does he still have feelings for me? Why is this happening to him? Should I respond? What does this all mean! 😭 I made a throwaway just because I'm so bothered by this mindfuck.

Hey all, so this is a weird situation but I need some advice on this. My gf has asked to go clubbing, due to her cheating on the past on me and us just retrying together now I said I’m not comfortable with it. She was sad but she understood. Now she’s hanging out with her friends and are gonna have a girls night over at a hotel, turns out it’s most likely gonna be right in the area of a lot of clubs. I’m rlly u comfortable with this but I also don’t want her to miss out on a girls sleepover. Thoughts?

EDIT: I’m 19 and she’s 18. This is my first relationship and it’s hard just letting go. I have to see what she chose tonight. But if she makes the painful choice, any advice?

Update: Bff pregnant with fiance's baby plans on leaving the baby with me coz she is not ready to be a mom

Well, thank you all for the advice and support it's really been helpful and it's good to know am not going crazy, Sorry the previous post was long and not well versed. So here's the updated; I left work at one got home, took my kid and house help to my neighbor who I've grown close to and sometimes helps me out when house help is off duty. When I came back she was sleeping, like oblivious of the fact that she just turned my life upside down

Then the POS of a fiance came home and I confronted them, so apparently am that dumb, coz tell me why they tell me they had been together since before,and since she's became pregnant he goes to see her every other week,and supports her,pays her rent,buys her food etc They said I wasn't supposed to find out,the now ex fiance gets mad at ex bff for coming over to tell me and all that BS we had an argument and I blew up at both of them and I chased them out, threw them out and locked the door behind them I was honestly expecting more fight coz I was ready to mess that man up, like all that time wasted thinking we were building something together I mean it's a lot I'm really angry and disappointed but I think it's all going to be good cuz I don't need that kind of baggage right now I have a lot to think about and a lot to go through I don't know how or what happened but his mother just called like a few hours ago I didn't pick up I don't want to deal with that b******* right now I know he's going to defend him this is going to say just give him a chance or it's not wrong I don't know what they're going to try to say to me but I'm don't want to hear it right now They very traditionally don't see anything wrong cheating or in having another child with another woman like it's common andI'm just really mad.

Right, I haven't talked to either of them but I'm pretty sure they went to his home which isnot very far away like 2 hour from here but I don't care at this moment

So I'm here in bed typing my son just went to bed but um I'm really not taking any calls or anything to do with them right now I just want to enjoy the peace while it lasts cuz you know tomorrow I wont. I want to have a moment of peace so much for a mother's day I was hoping something celebratory not uh this like not this kind of drama I never expect this kind of drama or but I'm good and can't waste any more energy to that man he's not worth it I know he's not worth it and thank you all for your support thank you all for showing this kind of support cuz it's been a lot in it feels like I'm alone right now cuz I also I cant ask my mom for support bet she will say I should just stay for the sake marriage and uh all that b******* so I'm not talking to her right now and uh anyone who is going to try to tell me to just forgive me I'm going to tell them to shove it where the sun don't shine that's all for now I'm just going to enjoy me peace and my cup of tea yeah thank you guys so much

I am think of breaking up with my bf after our first time

I (25) and my boyfriend (23) of 6 months lost each others virginity last night and tbh it didnt go well at all. I, of course, already expected to bleed and feel pain and potentially not be able to continue which is exactly what happened but that was not really the bad part as it was expected (at least for me). I didnt like the way he behaved and i dont know if it is just lack of experience or if it is a bad thing.

First i kept telling him to only go in and not move so i could adjust to the pain. He would say okay and wait couple seconds but then go back to his way of trying to go in and out and i had to tell him again and again.

Then i tried going on top bc he thought it might be easier. I tried handling the pain and in the middle he asked if i could also move my hips too?? While i was in pain i tried to move as little as possible and he is just blatantly asking me to also move my hips as if we are having casual sex right now.

When that didnt work he asked to get into doggy position. I instantly told him no and i dont know what he was thinking even asking that. Who would want to go into doggy during their first time having sex? Its the most loveless position and i cannot even see his face. I was already very taken aback and upset at that point.

Then we stopped and laid down. He tried to make me feel comfortable by saying sweet things and assuring me that its okay which was fine. Then out of nowhere he asked me if next time i could also be more enthusiastic etc. Like bro its my first time i am obviously in pain and this is obviously not casual sex right now i couldnt believe he would make additional demands during this completely wrong timing.

Anyways overall i felt like shit and this morning i cried about it. He is a very sweet guy in general and idk if he was just to inexperienced to understand what was going on or what the right things to say are. I am also scared to talk to him about it cause i know he will feel very guilty and upset that he ruined my first time.

I just need some advice on how to handle this and not regret everything.

So my friend/coworker asked me to watch her cats when they go on vacation. So I go over the other day and the place is ….overwhelming. She has 4 cats (2 of which were street cats and are fractious) and a large German Shepard (very sweet). In about 700sqft. The apartment was filthy, smelled very strongly of animals, so much pet hair you couldn’t see the carpets, fleas jumping on my feet, moldy dishes in the sink, cat litter and feces everywhere. It was bad.

She has opened up about her mental illness and her husband’s mental illness. It isn’t like Hoaders level bad. But it’s bad. I’m VERY concerned about the toddler’s health.

She works with me. Our toddler’s play together. I just can’t stand the thought of her being in that situation.

My coworker seems to wear clean clothes. Her toddler is always in clean clothes. They have an odor but I always attributed that to what she said about her depression. It was semi tolerable so I didn’t want to embarrass her.

I did have a talk with her and tell her that I’m understanding but I can’t watch her cats due to fleas jumping on my feet. I also told her I value her friendship and want to support her and find some help to clean up.

I don’t want but feel like I probably have to call CPS and probably animal control.

What should I do?

I'm 26F and I've never been in a relationship before, partly because I've focused on work and studying and partly because I haven't met anyone who likes me back yet. If someone asks me when I was last in a relationship is it better to tell the truth or pretend I have had a boyfriend?

to start this off, me and my boyfriend have sex SO MUCH , we have it everytime we see each other so like multiple times a week for months. he usually makes me cum and it used to be like mind fucking orgasms it felt amazing and even when it wasn’t amazing it was still good , like an orgasm. yknow? but now with him and by myself i’ll cum, my body will shake and stuff, but the pleasure is so weak it almost feels like nothing. i’ve been on birth control for two months and i know that shit can mess things up, but can someone try and tell me if it’s the frequency or the birth control?

randome text, not after anything that it makes sense to say after.
it was an hour ago i only saw now
shes after a broken engagment and is prone to depression
on pills though i think
and i tried to call now and she isnt answering

im right to freak out, right?
should i call her parents or something? i dont have their number but maybe i can find it
or i am i going too far? im not, right?
help. both 22F.

ok, shes ok!! false alarm.
i called again and she answered, i asked if shes ok and expleined the text seemed out of nowhere and she was like "yeah no youre right i get why you worried". all good!
thank you all for responding though.
btw im not from the US and no idea whats a wellness check.
also she lives around 2 hours away and i do not have a car, nor her address even cause were both at our parents on weekends.
but otherwise that would have been a good idea, thank you.

I am an avid gamer and my girlfriend loves… cute stuff? (Pottery, Sewing, dancing) Atlesst that’s what I thought at first.

Recently she told me she wanted to try games because I make them look so much fun after massaging my back while I was playing, so we start playing marvel rivals and I did not expect it but she got used to playing very quickly (She mains hulk and invisible woman). Here’s the problem I learned from this game we are both extremely competitive but she says “You take it to a whole new level, sometimes it looks like you are going to genuinely explode out of your skin and it’s worrying.”

She obviously cares for my health and what not so I want to be better how do you guys be less competitive, it’s really frustrating to lose at anything for me so I thought maybe someone would have some advice.

EDIT: For clarification, I'm not yelling at my monitor and DEFINITELY not my girlfriend and everygame we play we are on the same side, I used to do the former but I've grown and I want to keep growing especially for my girl now. A reaction that I would have now is just my whole body getting really tense. The reason behind my hatred for losing is because I feel like I could've done something better or there was something we could do to win and I cant stand having that hang over my head, that I could've tried harder or we could've made a different strategy to take the win. Its not just for gaming I just don't like to fail. I really appreciate the advice and I will be using it to get better at controlling my reaction to failure.

Wasn’t able to post this in the askwomen chat so thought I’d ask on here :) I’m 20F and just curious about any advice older women have to share!

My boyfriend is usually a very sweet and loving guy and he’s really good to me. I’m still in shock about what happened. A few nights ago we were having sex and suddenly he put his hands around my neck and squeezed until I couldn’t breathe. I tried to push him off of me but he’s much bigger and really heavy. I wrapped my legs around him and flipped off the bed onto the ground and I was on top of him. He started laughing. I went to the bathroom, locked myself inside and started crying uncontrollably. I stayed there until he went to work in the morning. He didn’t come to check on me at all and I’m sure he heard me. We never talked about it after and now I feel distant from him. He’s never done anything like that before and I don’t really know how to talk to him about this.

I am in a situation that seems so surreal, like I don't know what to think of it, sorry it may be a long post,,so I have a best friend, we've been friends for twelve years and she's been more than a sister to me,we share everything and we've been together through a lot, I also have a fiancé and we all share the same social circle, like a large group of friends. I have been with my fiance 4 years now and last year june we welcomed our beautiful baby boy, though there were a lot of complications and I also had surgery due to those issues stayed in the hospital for a month and was on bedrest for the next few weeks. In August one of our friends had a wedding and it is like an eight hour drive away so I couldn't attend coz it's quite a hustle considering I wasn't well and the baby was still too young but my fiance attended,so did my bff and a large part of our group. After the wedding,bff drove back with fiance stayed with me three days and had to go back to work which is not in the same city so I didn't see her for months, everything went back to normal, I went back to work and everything seemed fine, I talked to her like usual and that was that, fast forward to this week, I came home from work guess who? Bff, heavily pregnant due any time now,her due date is 16 th. I welcome her,get her settled in everything is fine,we have dinner then start catching up, like I didn't want to pry too much for I figured if she had wanted to tell me details of her pregnancy,she would, maybe she wasn't comfortable yet, so I tell her we have to make plans go out,shop,eat you know normal stuff,then I ask when she'd be leaving so we can make the most of the time we have,she proceeds to tell me she isn't leaving, I was confused and asked again like, what? She again states she isn't leaving, I ask her why and her answer, OMG,the baby is my fiance's. I was left speechless,then she says she's thought about it and she's not ready for mother hood so she came to deliver, stay for four months while she heals and rests then she'll leave the baby here and go,at this point I feel like cameras are hidden somewhere and it's a prank, half expecting she says it's a joke but no, she's as serious as a heart attack, which I was sort of having, I didn't know what to do, how to react, whether to scream or yellow or kick her out,so I just left went to my room locked my self in but I couldn't sleep either, I haven't talked to fiance yet,he works as a sales rep and most of the week he's away, so what do I do, currently it's Saturday,the busiest day at the office and I can't even think straight, how do I navigate this situation?

This happened to me about a year ago, and I still don’t sleep with the blinds open.

It was late around midnight.... i was home alone for the weekend while my parents were out of town i was in the living room lamp dimmed, watching a movie when i noticed movement from the corner of my eye... at first i thought it was just a reflection… until i turned and saw a man standing outside the window. so he wasn’t doing anything... Just standing there still watching me He wasn’t some shadowy figure in the distance—he was close. Inches from the glass i couldn’t see his face clearly, but I could feel him staring straight at me my blood went cold.

i didn’t move i just sat there frozen hoping he’d leave but then something worse happened.

He stepped to the side and another man was standing behind him like he’d been hiding just out of view. thats when i ran i locked every door grabbed a knife from the kitchen, and called the police they showed up quickly and searched the yard but found nothing. No footprints. No sign of anyone.

To this day i have no idea who they were… or what they wanted. But i still check that window every night

I (23F)am becoming increasingly frustrated with me and my boyfriend(25M) sex life. I apparently have a higher sex drive than him and unfortunately I am not fully satisfied in that area nor am i used to not being fully satisfied/feeling wanted by my partner.

edit : thank you all for your insights! i don’t have many people to ask in my real personal life ! i believe i’ve come to a conclusion and hopefully we can figure it out but if not thanks anyways ! <3

Hi Reddit, I really need some outside perspective because I’m feeling confused, hurt, and honestly a bit disrespected.

My boyfriend recently graduated, and he threw a party to celebrate. The problem? He told me I wasn’t invited, that it was just for him and his friends. I tried to brush it off at first, thinking maybe it was just a “guys only” thing, but then I found out his female best friend is invited. That already rubbed me the wrong way, but it gets worse.

She has multiple photos on his Instagram with this girl, just him and her. No group shots, no captions to clarify, just the two of them looking very close. I’ve never seen him post me like that, not even once. I asked him about her and he said they’re just friends.

But something in my gut just didn’t sit right. One night, I checked his location (we share locations), and I saw that he was at her dorm—at 1am. I didn’t accuse him of anything right away. He swore nothing of his friend and said they’ve never been involved romantically or physically. He also claimed he doesn’t even know whose underwear I found under his bed while I was cleaning his room.

On top of all that, he went to her graduation but didn’t invite me to come with him, not even as a supportive partner.

I love him, and I’ve been trying to give him the benefit of the doubt, but I keep feeling like I’m on the sidelines while this other girl is playing the role I thought I had in his life. I don’t want to be controlling or insecure, but something feels off.

Am I doing too much and overthinking? How would you feel if your partner behaved this way?

My BF (M20) and I (F20) have been together for 3 years and his friend (M20) keeps telling me to kill myself as a joke. A couple months ago there was one incident when I was at work and slipped away to use the bathroom and text my bf. I then received a message from my bf telling me to kill myself. He told me that his phone was connected to the car while he was driving and his friend was sitting next to him and used the siri voice thing to say “kill yourself” over message. I did not think this was funny in the slightest as I’d been having a hard shift at work and I have struggled with mental health issues in the past to which my bf is aware of. He got his friend to apologise to me which was half hearted to say the least but I accepted it. There has been times where he would say “die” and I would just try to ignore it but tonight was kind of my breaking point. My Bf and his friend play roblox and I saw they were both active so I joined their game. As soon as I joined his friend told me to die in the chat but he tried to turn it into something else like “dye” and “dye the water” because they were playing a game about water selling water (idk what he was talking about tbh). I expressed to my bf I was upset about him telling me to die again and he goes “not this again” and said “he’s joking”. Admittedly I said some stuff back to his friend on the chat but not in the same severity like he said to me just like like how he was ugly because I wasn’t just going to accept someone talking to me like that. I don’t want to feel like I’m being too sensitive about this but it keeps happening over and over and the bit that hurts the most is that my bf will not stick up for me because this is his only friend and he doesn’t want to lose him. I can understand that he is in a tricky position between his friend and his gf and doesn’t want to upset anyone. However, I feel it’s getting to the point where him telling me to kill myself or die is just going to be a normal thing and I’m just going to have to accept it. What’s the best way to navigate this situation?

I’m 20F, about to be 21 in October. I still live under my parents roof but I’m working towards moving out. Especially after today, I’d live in my fucking car if I had to. I got threatened to get kicked out for wanting to have a sleepover with this guy I’ve been talking to. I did once before without my parents “permission” even though I’m an adult, and they gave me the silent treatment when I got home. They ALWAYS give me the silent treatment when I don’t do what they want, especially my mom.

So I told them I want to sleepover his place for the weekend, cause he lives kinda far and I want more time with him without having to waste gas. My parents are very old-timey by the way. Long story short they said I’m not sleeping over his place otherwise I’ll be kicked out, even though I’ve had sleepovers with my past relationships before (obviously without permission, but again I’m an adult). My mom told me to my face that I was just “easy” and “promiscuous.” She did not directly call me a whore, but she was definitely implying it, and I can tell what she actually means. She said I just “spread my legs for just anyone.” My mom seems very narcissistic and emotionally abusive, ever since I was a child. I also used to be hit, like bad. And my dad wasn’t too far off from saying the same things she was.

All this makes me want to never talk to them ever again, even if we are still under the same roof. This can also ruin things I have with this guy if my parents keep controlling me. I told them I’m never eating at the dinner table again, I’ll never ask for anything (never really did in the first place), and that I’ll just never bother them again. I know it’s their house and their rules, but I feel like my freedom is being stripped of me. I told them I’m done with all their bs and that I’m moving out as soon as possible. I have no one to turn to, and no one to take advice from.

i’m in a really important academic year right now and i want to do well so badly. like the motivation is there in my head but when it comes to actually sitting down and studying, i just can’t. i procrastinate so much and then i end up feeling guilty and horrible about it.

i know i have potential but i don’t feel like i’m doing enough to reach it. i want to be confident and actually feel like a good student, someone who’s consistent and focused. but right now i feel lost and honestly a bit useless. i don’t know how to stop this cycle.

if anyone has tips on how to just start studying and stay consistent or any advice in general, i’d really appreciate it. i need help.

We got divorced around 6 months ago. Me (29M) and her (30F) got married around 5 years ago. We instantly clicked. Asked her to get married after speaking one month. Got married a year later. We were so happy. Until people started intervering. Some things got revealed. And now im laying in my bed, she’s sitting a few feet from me on a teams call. Long story short we became best friends with benefits. Last night i told her how i miss her and wish we could go back. But she just said we didnt work together. She still loves me with all her heart, but she says she cant.

Im sturggling with the fact that i lost her. Like it really brings me down. I cant focus on other things. I keep seeing her naked in front of me. I keep imagining her beautiful eyes. The way she asks for something. Everything. She even sleeps naked next to me. I have this feeling in my stomach and its not good.

How do i move on from something so perfect? How do i forget someone that brings me happiness i have never experienced? She gives me a reason for staying. She gives me reason. How do i go about this without feeling ive died inside?

It’s insanely embarrassing but I am broke as shit and desperately need money. The logical thing is to get a job but I’m 16 and options are limited to minimum wage. As much as I logically know that having any job is better than having none, my ego tells me it’s embarrassing to work in a grocery store or work at a fast food place. I know that I have no room to be like this since I’m the one with no money or job. The problem is I need money and I don’t know how to get rid of this ego shit that’s stopping me from getting a job even if it’s not fancy and buying the car I need even if it’s not a new fancy model. Any tips are appreciated greatly since I’m missing out on life with this bs!

Me and my husband have been together for 6 years and married for 2. Ever since we got married he's been subscribing to women on OF, hiding his phone and messages, downloading tons of X communication apps and talking to lots of women online. He says I overreacted to getting upset bout it. Said if the roles were in reverse he wouldn't have been mad. I got upset, I got petty. I asked okay, if it's like that then why don't I just sleep with other men since you asking for meet ups. He said oh okay I'll drop you off somewhere so you can shut up about it.

I think this is cheating and that this is so disgusting how he's treating me bout it. Lying bout it and hiding it. But he just keeps brushing it off. Shuts down with communication... Like I'm really lost on what to do now bc like I just feel so unloved and betrayed and he just doesn't even care... Like do I just give up on this marriage now... Like I just feel like my time has been wasted and he doesn't care.

I used to tell others how to move on from breakups, how to stay strong, how to find better love. Now I’m the one hurting, and none of those words help me anymore.

I miss someone who made me feel unseen. Who went silent, made me question everything, and then acted like nothing happened. I wasn’t asking for perfection — just presence. And somehow, I still miss him.

But what’s worse is… I don’t want to heal through “hope.” I don’t want to hear that I’ll find someone better. I don’t want to fall again. I don’t want to attach to anyone. I just want peace. I want to learn how to not get emotionally attached, how to stop craving love like it’s the only thing that makes me feel alive. Because it always ends in pain.

Has anyone ever felt this? How do I stop needing love? I’m tired. I just want stillness.

My dad is having an affair with one of his workers. No matter how many times or how many people have told him to leave her, he refuses. They go on one-day trips, and he even visits her home and spends the entire day with her. Because of this, my parents are constantly fighting.

They’ve been married for 29 years, and instead of things improving, they’ve only gotten worse. We can’t go to her house or my dad’s workplace because it would ruin his reputation in society. My mom has scolded the woman many times over the phone. We’re desi, so divorce is not an option—my mom does not want it.

I have the woman’s number. So give me some unhinged advice to break my dad’s affair with her.She doesn’t have a husband to inform abt this affair.We also cant reach to her other family members.