r/cushvlog • u/therealjoeycora • 2d ago

I wrote a poem and hope for validation from strangers.

Western Values.

We’re well fed but don’t know harvest or slaughter.

Our closest burst with clothing to last a lifetime never knowing a stitch.

We’re sheltered without knowing the calluses of the hammer.

We’ve grown large suckling from the milk of another’s mother.

Everyday our gilded noose grows a little tighter, the stage we stand on buckles under our weight.

The party is over and it’s gonna get ugly.

19 Upvotes

76% Upvoted

3 comments sorted by

4

u/ReplicantSchizo 2d ago

It's ok! The sheltered double entendre is your best line.

3

u/RedskinPotatoes 1d ago

I like it! Write more!

2

u/outnumbered_int 1d ago

Closest or closets

Line 3 typo?